I've been busy with editing my novel manuscript lately, so I haven't done much artwork, and the artwork I have done are small 4x6, 5x7, or 8x10 works. (The leaf paintings I've been posting about the last several days were completed a few weeks ago - they were being flattened under stacks of heavy books for awhile, and then I had to mat them and take all the photographs and I only just recently got them up here on the blog and on Etsy.)
It's been a couple months since I started those two larger patterned rose paintings and for several weeks I've kind of been "stuck" - procrastinating on working on them.
The reason for my stalling is this - I'm at a point with these paintings where I've put so many layers down that it's hard to see the pencil lines underneath, particularly in the centers of the roses, where the shadows are darker. These paintings are not stapled down, so I could easily redraw some of those lines (maybe even try to retrace them, if the autumn-winter sun would ever be bright enough to penetrate through the layers of paint and let me). But that seems like extra work - to go back to the drafting and planning part of the painting. And I haven't felt like taking that step backward.
I mean, the solution is clear - swallow my pride and take the extra hour to "replan" where to go from here. Consider the pieces as a whole and make decisions and plot a course for bringing these "in progress" paintings into the end-zone. I just haven't wanted to take the time to do that.
It occurred to me that this is not unlike where I'm at with editing my manuscript. I've already planned out the story and used that plan to write the story. I've even already edited it (several times). But now I'm going through and re-reading it again, so that I can evaluate what's working and what isn't, and pare things down to let the essence better shine through. And maybe it's just the nature of the beast that the editing is more tedious and less fun than the writing parts, but also I think I haven't been enjoying it as much because I keep getting into this mindset that going through and making these edits is a "step back." I think - I should have gotten this right the first time, but instead I have to go back through and revisit it. And of course it's not going to be enjoyable if I think about it like that!
Lately I've been trying to focus on the parts that are working. It's not that I should have just "written it right the first time" - it's that I did write it right the first time, but then I covered up the good stuff with mediocre stuff like a pirate burying his treasure, and now I'm digging back through to uncover the treasure and let it shine. It's not really a step back, it's just part of the process.
And I need to think about my larger artworks in that same way. It's not a step back to look at the painting as a whole and make decisions about where it needs to go from here. I did it all the time in my college studio classes - we were required to. We even had to do it in front of everyone. We all hung our paintings on the wall and critiqued our own stuff and critiqued each other's stuff, while it was still in progress, so that we could incorporate critique epiphanies into the painting before it was too overworked to allow further changes. In the case of art critique, it is literally a step back, since we walk away from the piece to see what is working from a distance, but it is not metaphorically a step back - as in, progress the "wrong way." It's just part of the process. Reevaluation is necessary to get to the finished product. No one "gets it right" the first time without taking that reevaluation step.
Life is often interpreted as a race. We start at the starting blocks and end at the finish line. Time is linear. We march forward along its line, and that's it. But who actually lives life that way? (And how boring would it be if we did?) Life is more like a dance than a race. We're not always moving in the same direction. We turn, we spin. We double back. And that's okay.
Completing projects are like little lives - whether they're manuscripts being written or watercolors being painted. They don't surge forward without break, without consideration, without the occasional pause to reevaluate where they're going. I need to stop thinking about these breaks as taking a step back (as if that were a bad thing!) and I need to stop letting myself procrastinating working through the important things that need to be recognized and dealt with. It has to be done, but it doesn't have to be a chore, and it's certainly not worth getting anxious about.
It's been a couple months since I started those two larger patterned rose paintings and for several weeks I've kind of been "stuck" - procrastinating on working on them.
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| 2 Rose Watercolor Paintings In Progress - by Andrea Arbit |
The reason for my stalling is this - I'm at a point with these paintings where I've put so many layers down that it's hard to see the pencil lines underneath, particularly in the centers of the roses, where the shadows are darker. These paintings are not stapled down, so I could easily redraw some of those lines (maybe even try to retrace them, if the autumn-winter sun would ever be bright enough to penetrate through the layers of paint and let me). But that seems like extra work - to go back to the drafting and planning part of the painting. And I haven't felt like taking that step backward.
I mean, the solution is clear - swallow my pride and take the extra hour to "replan" where to go from here. Consider the pieces as a whole and make decisions and plot a course for bringing these "in progress" paintings into the end-zone. I just haven't wanted to take the time to do that.
It occurred to me that this is not unlike where I'm at with editing my manuscript. I've already planned out the story and used that plan to write the story. I've even already edited it (several times). But now I'm going through and re-reading it again, so that I can evaluate what's working and what isn't, and pare things down to let the essence better shine through. And maybe it's just the nature of the beast that the editing is more tedious and less fun than the writing parts, but also I think I haven't been enjoying it as much because I keep getting into this mindset that going through and making these edits is a "step back." I think - I should have gotten this right the first time, but instead I have to go back through and revisit it. And of course it's not going to be enjoyable if I think about it like that!
Lately I've been trying to focus on the parts that are working. It's not that I should have just "written it right the first time" - it's that I did write it right the first time, but then I covered up the good stuff with mediocre stuff like a pirate burying his treasure, and now I'm digging back through to uncover the treasure and let it shine. It's not really a step back, it's just part of the process.
And I need to think about my larger artworks in that same way. It's not a step back to look at the painting as a whole and make decisions about where it needs to go from here. I did it all the time in my college studio classes - we were required to. We even had to do it in front of everyone. We all hung our paintings on the wall and critiqued our own stuff and critiqued each other's stuff, while it was still in progress, so that we could incorporate critique epiphanies into the painting before it was too overworked to allow further changes. In the case of art critique, it is literally a step back, since we walk away from the piece to see what is working from a distance, but it is not metaphorically a step back - as in, progress the "wrong way." It's just part of the process. Reevaluation is necessary to get to the finished product. No one "gets it right" the first time without taking that reevaluation step.
Life is often interpreted as a race. We start at the starting blocks and end at the finish line. Time is linear. We march forward along its line, and that's it. But who actually lives life that way? (And how boring would it be if we did?) Life is more like a dance than a race. We're not always moving in the same direction. We turn, we spin. We double back. And that's okay.
Completing projects are like little lives - whether they're manuscripts being written or watercolors being painted. They don't surge forward without break, without consideration, without the occasional pause to reevaluate where they're going. I need to stop thinking about these breaks as taking a step back (as if that were a bad thing!) and I need to stop letting myself procrastinating working through the important things that need to be recognized and dealt with. It has to be done, but it doesn't have to be a chore, and it's certainly not worth getting anxious about.
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